Slavery: Alive and Well

Today’s post is not a joyful post. It is not about fitness or cows. There will be no pictures posted nor will I share some pithy saying. Today’s post is serious and I hope you’ll take note of it.

Last night, after watching rock week on American Idol, we ended up at our local Public Broadcasting Station watching Frontline of all things. Usually a nice newsie show such as this will cause Girl to find other things to do. She’s 16 and not terribly interested in news programs of any kind. Thankfully, she stayed for the entire episode, glued, as it were, to the screen.

human trafficking-sex slaves-forced labor-kidnapping-imprisonment-rape-disease-despair-death

Between 600,000 – 800,000 men, women, and children are trafficked internationally each and every year. They end up in far away from home, passports taken, forced to do the unimaginable, in conditions that are not fit for human or beast. The slaves are preyed upon by those who promise work and a better life. Other times slaves are simply kidnapped from their very homes or fields and forced into labor.

And it happens in the good ole’ U S of A. That’s right. Right here in River City. Right in your hometown someone may be held against their will in the slave trade. And you thought slavery had been abolished in America. Think again.

As we watched the program on Frontline I had the passing thought that I should turn the channel because it was so disturbing. When I looked at my daughter, my 16-yar-old daughter, my blonde and very cute daughter, I saw her eyes fixed on the screen. I wondered if she was breathing.

We watched the rest of the program. We watched a man trying to buy his wife back from a pimp. We traveled home with a young woman who had escaped prostitution only to return to it in order to provide for her family. We drank in the despair, the hopelessness, and the darkness of the human soul.

As I watched my little girl, I thought about the things we had taught her. The ways she’s been taught to defend herself.

(always go for the eyes and make as much noise as possible – fight as if you life depends on it because it just may - never go anywhere with strangers – if it sounds to good to be true, it probably is – make eye contact and give the look of "what the hell are you looking at" when needed – never put yourself in a positions that could be dangerous – trust your mama, you daddy, and your brother, everyone else is questionable).

I thought about mothers worldwide whose children have been snatched away from them. I thought about the young women, chosen for their looks, who languish in the human sex trade and I considered the men and women who sold them. (I wonder too, how these people can live with themselves!)

Although every nation on the earth has laws against slavery it continues. Traffickers are often protected by local police. The legal system slaps the hands of the convicted with probation or a handful of years in prison. This should not be.

I would urge you to consider your life. Imagine being forced into the sex trade, beaten, battered, and abused. Imagine if it were your daughter (or son). Go to the frontline website above and watch the program. Visit International Justice Mission and learn more. Pray for those held in slavery. Donate. Do something.

My daughter is a beautiful, fun loving, sweet sixteen. I cannot imagine her as a sex slave. I would be willing to bet most mothers can’t imagine such a thing happening to their child.

But it happens. Every. Day.

DO SOMETHING NOW!

The Truth Is...

1. The truth is I think my brother, The Golden Child, is an idiot about 89.9% of the time. I love him but come on!

2. The truth is I drink non-fat milk in my coffee and tell people it's pretty good. That is a lie. I know that's a lie because I mistakenly ended up with a coffee with REAL milk in and let me tell you, it's good. It's so much better than that fakey non-fat milk. However, I will continue to use non-fat milk. Sigh.

3. The truth is I'm cold most of the time. Which is part of the reason I will never get a tat. Where would I put it? No one will ever see it and would thus render it pointless.

4. The truth is I really want to be a rebel and shock people. However, I lack the confidence to actually do it. My children would have to deal with the fall out and since they still hang out with me from time to time, I better play it cool.

5. The truth is I like motorcycles.

6. The truth is, hold on to your hat Virginia, I like some music by Ozzy, Van Halen, CCR, and Jack Johnson.

7. The truth is I'm a book snob and few modern books impress me. Inkheart, by Cornelia Funke, impresses me. A children's book no less! I'm captured by the weave of the story, the language, and the mystery. Well done Cornelia, well done!

8. The truth is I say too much. I should never leave the house without duct tape.

9. The truth is I don't miss my mother. Not. One. Bit.

10. The truth is I hate vintage stereo equipment (and the vinyl that goes with it) and yet my house if chock full of it.

Now it's your turn.

Tell me the truth (I promise I'll still love you).

Shiver

It was one year ago today that The Destroyer and the Monster returned to their birth mother via the Department of Child Services. At the time, I wondered if I'd ever get over the worry, the fear, the depression of it all.

In eleven months those two tiny tyrants raised my blood pressure, helped me pack on fifteen pounds, and drove us all mad.

The also made me a better person.

Ouch.

In the year since they left I've lost thirty pounds, been gainfully employed, and realized that forty is a terrific age.

During this year I've been reminded that I am a failure and I've lost friends, but I made new ones as well.

My babies are nearly grown and I am proud of the young man and young woman they have become. My Beloved is healthy and gainfully employed and I'm making peace with FIL (again).

I miss those two little tyrants. I miss their funny jokes, their blondie hair, and all the fun times. But I don't miss the bad: the tantrums, the screaming, their dirty return from a visit with their mother.

There are 8000 children currently in foster care in my state. That's shocking. Still more shocking is the simple fact that there are NOT enough homes for these displaced children.

It makes me feel guilty.

It makes me angry.

Then yesterday a message was left for me from DCS. I message that they wanted to talk. It could only mean one thing: Foster parenting.

All night long I've thought about that message and what it could mean. I shivered with fear, knowing how hard foster care is.

All things considered, I don't know what to think. I suppose I should simply call them and find out exactly what they want. There may be something to consider.

Or

It may send me screaming into the night.

Did They Know?

It’s something they never tell you.

You’re told to play nice and to share. You’re forced to endure hours of lectures on everything from personal finance to being a good citizen. Dress this way, don’t eat that, drink more water. Exercise. Sleep. Be responsible.

And most of us do. We are good citizens. We vote. We pay our taxes. Raise our children. We feed the poor, pick up trash, write letters to the editor. All this we do. But they never told us.

They “forgot” to mention that women who turn forty suddenly go a little crazy.

We get tattoos. We pierce various parts of our body. We go back to school. She rides a motorcycle. She bought a convertible. That one has a much younger boy friend. We love our husbands, but wonder how we ever put up with so much whining, groaning and complaining.

We begin to wonder why we asked permission to leave our young children with their father (you know, that man who lives in your house) so we could have one afternoon ALONE.

At forty we started to see the world in a different light. Gone are the uncertainties of our twenties. We’ve laid the anxiety of our thirties aside and face forty with a new energy. A new attitude. A fresh beginning.

Yet, they never told us how marvelous forty is. They never told us that we’d make peace with our bodies, learning that hard work pays off with thinner waist lines. We would learn that exercise was for us, not for anyone else. That for once in our lives we could be, dare I say it, selfish. Somehow they forgot to mention that at forty we could be strong. Both physically and mentally.

Maybe they didn’t tell us because they didn’t know. Perhaps they didn’t view forty as a positive thing. Some still don’t. But I have to say, at forty-one, that I like me. My hair is turning gray and gravity has taken a dreadful toll upon my body, yet, I like me.

I’m stronger than I use to be.

I’m not afraid to speak my mind, consequence be damned.

I can agree to disagree and still like you.

I like who I’ve become and the sense of balance I now have. I like my children and the fact that I don’t have to arrange “play dates” in order to see my friends.

I adore my husband, even though he doesn’t understand what I’m trying to say here. All he knows is that the woman who lives in his house wants him to eat more fiber. She sometimes wakes up dripping wet and irritable. He knows that this woman has a mind of her own, a bad attitude, and cries over silly things.

He’s clueless, but content. The other day he said, “I love you,” and I replied, “What’s not to love?” He blinked at me, smiled, and held me close. He doesn’t get it because they never told him either.

I tried to explain things to him. Tried to make him feel the excitement I feel about all the wonderful possibilities that lay ahead of us. He just smiled…and went to sleep.

Maybe they didn’t tell us because they, our older sisters, never fully grasped what forty means. Perhaps they thought we couldn’t handle the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. But I wish they’d told me. I wish they’d said that babies are wonderful, and teenagers are amazing. I wish they’d reminded me that bitterness isn’t worth stewing on and relationships are more important. I wonder why they didn’t tell us how lovely we could be at forty.

Maybe…maybe they simply didn’t know.

150 Things You Didn't Want to Know about Me

Snatched from Patti-O who swiped it from Travis. Feel free to grab it and answer for yourself. Frankly, I think I’m a bit too boring…


01. Bought everyone in the bar a drink – Seriously? LOL, nope!

02. Swam with wild dolphins – No, but I know someone who did.

03. Climbed a mountain – Beloved said, “No. You cannot count the hike to the top of Multnomah Falls. I think he’s wrong :P

04. Taken a Ferrari for a test drive – I have driven a convertible sports car on Maui (good times, huh Kat?)

05. Been inside the Great Pyramid – I is scared of the Muslims…

06. Held a tarantula – Hell no!

07. Taken a candlelit bath with someone – You know, I can’t remember…

08. Said “I love you” and meant it – Yes indeed!

09. Hugged a tree – Only because I was being sarcastic (go figure).

10. Bungee jumped – Nope, got way better things to do (like file my nails).

11. Visited Paris – Sadly, no.

12. Watched a lightning storm at sea – My Mama taught me to come in out of the rain.

13. Stayed up all night long and saw the sun rise – Years ago.

14. Seen the Northern Lights - Nope

15. Gone to a huge sports game – Do Blazer games count? Cause I don’t think so, regardless of what Mike says 

16. Walked the stairs to the top of the leaning Tower of Pisa – Har har har

17. Grown and eaten your own vegetables – You betcha!

18. Touched an iceberg - Nope

19. Slept under the stars – On the deck in the summer time with my brothers.

20. Changed a baby’s nappy – They are called diapers. Welcome to America.

21. Taken a trip in a hot air balloon – No, but Beloved use to be part of a chase crew for one.

22. Watched a meteor shower – Best fireworks there are!

23. Gotten tipsy on champagne - Yep

24. Given more than you can afford to charity - Yeppers

25. Looked up at the night sky through a telescope – With my girl (of course I was freezing my fanny off and hoping she’d wrapped it up fast! Sorry girl!)

26. Had an uncontrollable giggling fit at the worst possible moment – When Grandma Grace passed away and my SIL and I were driving back from the funeral home with her ashes. SIL opened the box (she’s funny that way) and the first thing I saw was a ziplock bag. Seriously. Grandma was in a ziplock bag, in a cardboard box, in the front seat of my car. Funny stuff.

28. Bet on a winning horse - Nope

29. Asked out a stranger – many moons ago.

30. Had a snowball fight – and lost.

31. Screamed as loudly as you possibly can – LOL isn’t that what a voice is for?

32. Held a lamb – Cuddly, wee, stupid things!

33. Seen a total eclipse of both the sun and moon – Yes

34. Ridden a roller coaster - Indeed

35. Hit a home run – Um, no.

36. Danced like a fool and not cared who was looking – It’s been a while.

37. Adopted an accent for an entire day – I don’t think I could pull it off for an entire day

38. Actually felt happy about your life, even for just a moment – Nearly every day 

39. Had two hard drives for your computer – OH THE SPACE!

40. Visited all 50 states - Nope

41. Taken care of someone who was drunk – Shall I name, names? Nope!

42. Had/Have amazing friends – I am blessed!

43. Danced with a stranger in a foreign country - Nope

44. Watched whales – That’s what they said on the tour in Hawaii (I didn’t see a single one, but they assured me they were there…)

45. Stolen a sign – No, but that doesn’t mean I wasn’t tempted!

46. Backpacked in Europe - Nah

47. Taken a road-trip – Me, Kat, and kiddies in the Suburban. Remember that lightening storm? Missa said, “I thought someone was taking a picture!”

48. Gone rock climbing - Nope

49. Midnight walk on the beach – Okay, tried it once and it scared me silly. Ask Beloved, he was there.

50. Gone sky diving – Har har har NO!

51. Visited Ireland – Nope, but would like to!

52. Been heartbroken longer than you were actually in love - I don’t think so.

53. In a restaurant, sat at a stranger’s table and had a meal with them – met a lovely couple from Canada!

54. Visited Japan - Nope

55. Milked a cow – Yeah but I wouldn’t want to make a career out of it.

56. Alphabetized your CDs - LOL

57. Pretended to be a superhero – Hello? Idiot girl to the rescue? Seriously, did you have to ask?

58. Sung karaoke – No way

59. Lounged around in bed all day – Only when I’m sick

60. Played touch football - Indeed

61. Gone scuba diving – does snorkeling count?

62. Kissed in the rain – sigh, yes.

63. Played in the mud – Kiddies remember…do you remember when I filled the outside tub with dirt and water? OOOHHHH what fun!

64. Played in the rain – Not made of sugar!

65. Gone to a drive-in theater – Yes indeed!

66. Visited the Great Wall of China - Nah

67. Started a business – Lots o’ work, great fun’ good memories!

68. Fallen in love and not had your heart broken – Beloved holds the key to my heart 

69. Toured ancient sites – Does my FIL shrine in the upstairs count?

70. Taken a martial arts class – ROFL, but I love Kung Fu Panda – Hi ya!

71. Played D&D for more than 6 hours straight – Better things to do with my time

72. Gotten married – Let me find that license

73. Been in a movie - Nope

74. Crashed a party – Can’t remember

75. Gotten divorced – NO!

76. Gone without food for 5 days – Have you seen me?

77. Made cookies from scratch – is there another way?

78. Won first prize in a costume contest - Nope

79. Ridden a gondola in Venice – Eww, no!

80. Gotten a tattoo – not yet…

81. Rafted a river - yep

82. Been on television news programs as an “expert” – I’ve been quoted as an expert in articles…ROFL!

83. Gotten flowers for no reason – Ahhh yes.

84. Performed on stage – Yes, but that was in a past life when I needed applause to fill that empty space inside.

85. Been to Las Vegas - nah

86. Recorded music – Nope, and trust me the musical world thanks me.

87. Eaten shark - nope

88. Kissed on the first date – (children avert thine eyes) Yes…snicker

89. Gone to Thailand - Nope

90. Bought a house – do I have to answer…it’s a sore subject!

91. Been in a combat zone – I have family. I think that counts.

92. Buried one/both of your parents – nope, but she’d like to bury me.

93. Been on a cruise ship – a floating city with no land IN SIGHT. Crazy head! No way.

94. Spoken more than one language fluently – sadly, no.

95. Performed in a Rocky Horror Picture Show – EGAD!

96. Raised children – it has been an honor to be called “mom”

97. Followed your favorite band/singer on tour – Nope, better things to do.

98. Passed out cold – only when I sick

99. Taken an exotic bicycle tour in a foreign country - nope

100. Picked up and moved to another city to just start over - I’ve wanted to for years…

101. Walked the Golden Gate Bridge – driven over it.

102. Sang loudly in the car, and didn’t stop when you knew someone was looking – duh!

103. Had plastic surgery – um, no.

104. Survived an accident that you shouldn’t have survived – nope

105. Wrote articles for a large publication – none of them were large, but I did get paid 

106. Lost over 100 pounds – Never had that many to lose, but I’ve only got 25 left to lose!

107. Held someone while they were having a flashback – egad!

108. Piloted an airplane – Seriously? Have you seen me drive a car? LOL!

109. Touched a stingray - nope

110. Broken someone’s heart – yeah and I still feel bad about it.

111. Helped an animal give birth – No, but I watched my BIL stick his arm so far inside a cow that I almost puked.

112. Won money on a TV game show - Nope

113. Broken a bone - No

114. Gone on an African photo safari – In Africa? No.

115. Had a facial part pierced other than your ears – why?

116. Fired a rifle, shotgun, or pistol – You betcha!

117. Eaten mushrooms that were gathered in the wild – No and my kidney’s thank me.

118. Ridden a horse - Yes

119. Had major surgery – Yep

120. Had a snake as a pet – Ewww!

121. Hiked to the bottom of the Grand Canyon – not yet

122. Slept 30 hours in a 48 hour time frame - Nope

123. Visited more foreign countries than U.S. states - Nope

124. Visited all 7 continents -Nah

125. Taken a canoe trip that lasted more than 2 days – I’m a hotel kinda girl.

126. Eaten kangaroo meat - Nope

127. Eaten sushi – Yep and I lived to tell the tale.

128. Had your picture in the newspaper – Yes! Wanna see?

129. Changed someone’s mind about something you care deeply about – I doubt it.

130. Gone back to school – um no.

131. Parasailed – Water and height…no.

132. touched a cockroach – Annie has run screaming from her computer…

133. Eaten fried green tomatoes – made em’ myself.

134. Read “The Iliad” – At least twice.

135. Selected one “important” author who you missed in school, and read – Do they actually teach the great ones any more?

136. Killed and prepared an animal for eating – That’s what grocery stores are for.

137. Skipped all your school reunions – every single one.

138. Communicated with someone without sharing a common spoken language – Yes indeed and it was way cool.

139. Been elected to public office – too many skeletons in the ole’ family closet!

140. Written your own computer language – Don’t even get me started on HTML!

141. Thought to yourself that you’re living your dream – No, but I’m a lucky girl anyway.

142. Had to put someone you love into hospice care - nope

143. Built your own PC from parts – parts of what?

144. Sold your own artwork to someone who didn’t know you – Yeah, but the cops made me give their money back. Seems it’s illegal to take advantage of the blind (Okay, I’m kidding! Geez!)

145. Had a booth at a street fair – Um, nope

146. Dyed your hair – A long time ago. But there are those who think I should now.

147. Been a DJ – LOL no.

148. Shaved your head – threatened to.

149. Caused a car accident – not yet

50. Saved someone’s life – no, but I am CPR certified! I dare ya to need mouth to mouth!