Friday, October 02, 2009

Things I've Learned

I am in love with Ikea! Love. It.

I was an Ikea virgin until yesterday. The Giver and I drove out to the only Ikea in town. It's a bit of a drive as it's out near the airport. Which would be one reason why I had never been. I do not drive that direction unless I'm going to the airport.

But...Ikea...ahhhhhh Ikea. How do I love thee? Let me count the ways;

I love your many interchangeable duvet covers.

I love all of your practical storage ideas.

I love gazing upon oodles of lamps, rugs, and skinny sinks (had I but known you existed when we were remodeling the bathroom! sob!).

I love cheap dish towels.

I love Swedish meatballs!

Ahh Ikea! I could spend days within the warm walls of your embrace.


I also learned that I am a Judaism snob. See, in my book (and God's too) you have to be BORN of a JEWISH woman to be a JEW. There is a very interesting lady at the gym. She's a fairly new member. Before she knew me she told me how much she hates Christians.


I didn't bother to GO THERE. I mean, why should I? She is entitled to her opinion.

Last night she told me that the day had been a very difficult day for her. When I asked why, she said it was an important religious holiday for her.

Knowing how she felt about Christianity, I asked which one.

She replied, "Yom Kippur."

Only she pronounced Kippur like know...those little fish snacks?


She doesn't know me. She doesn't know of my deep love of the Jewish people. She doesn't know that I know a smattering of Hebrew. She doesn't realize the amount of time I spent with the Rabbi and family.

I said, "Oh, you mean, Yom Kippur."

Oh, yes, of course, she retorted.

I left it alone. She doesn't need to know what a snob I am. I will be kind and friendly to her as long as she is a member at the club. She doesn't need to know that I think she's a phony...she's not a Jew, brother!

היא לא אח יהודי,! (this should be posted on the other side of this blog, but blogger doesn't seem to know that!)

I also learned that my bank now charges me for checks. In the past I received them for free. This is just one more reason why I hate CHASE.

I opted to order through someone else and saved $6.00.

Take that!

Then, I learned the real reason why I've been so angry with my Mother. It's not because she refused to talk to Omi a month ago. It isn't because while Omi lay there dying she said, "That's too bad".


It's because...drum roll...if it were me, dying, she wouldn't speak to me. She would let me die and never apologize for being a doof.

And that makes my stomach hurt.

Funny, isn't it? I said (and I do mean it) that I am fine without her. Actually, I'm better. But in my little girl soul, I want a mommy.

And I've never truly had one.

Kinda sucks.

Yes it does.

But then....

I learned that someone I barely know cares about me.


Another woman at the gym was part of a conversation about mothers. When someone asked about mine, I replied that mine doesn't like me. This woman, who is my mother's age, looked at me with such a shocked expression that I laughed out loud.

I assured her that I'm just fine and it no longer bothers me that Mother dearest thinks I'm a troll.

Last night, the same woman came into the club and pulled me aside. She said,

"Everyone needs a mom. If you ever want to talk or need anything, I'll be your mother. I know I can't replace the real one, but I know what it feels like to be an orphan. I'm here for you."

I almost cried.

I really did.

And so I learned that even though I'm an idiot and Mother dearest hates me, that there must be something lovable about me.

These are the things I learned just yesterday! I cannot wait to see what today brings!


Patti said...

i've never really had a mom either. will your friend adopt us both?!

Island Rider said...

What blessed women you are to have found each other. Love goes two ways. She needs you just as much as you need her, I bet.

Janie at Sounding Forth said...

Wow. Powerful stuff. I'd taker her up on the Mom thing...

Anonymous said...

the singer is there? Hi singer!

THe only time I was in an IKEA was in Moscow - I discovered while in the restroom in Ikea I had left my purse at the Moscow Airport - boy was hubby ready to hurt me .. but he did not. :) I am here . . . still stalking.

I guess I should go visit the Ikea here . ..

Sad on your mom . .. happy on the adopted mom - how sweet :)


Barrie said...

Have you tried the orange chocolate at Ikea? Very. Yummmmmy.