I love me some Triscuts. I honestly do. A serving is six...only six tasty crackers...but if you eat them slow and with some Laughing Cow low fat cheese you WILL be happy. I promise.
There is only one problem. Girl loves her some Triscuts too. Which means that a regular, small, normal people size box of Triscuts is not going to last in this house. We decided to start buying the FAMILY SIZE box. Which was okay, until we decided that Sunday night dinner should be snacky dinner.
You know what I mean; crackers, lots of fresh veggies and fruit, a little bit of Laughing Cow maybe a slice of pepperoni, some Hummus, it's all good, reasonably nutritious and easy to fix. But then we run out of crackers sooner!
And Boy isn't even home!
So, I started thinking about what FAMILY SIZE means. It can't possibly mean that the box is large enough to feed a LARGE family. I have friends with many, many, many children and a box of Triscuits would last about 2.4 seconds. That isn't even enough time to get the box from the car to the house!
Then, I started thinking about other FAMILY SIZE boxed items, you know, like brownie mixes. Now, when it comes to brownies, I'm a bit of a snob. I like the home made kind. The kind that Alton Brown makes.
(I have the recipe and if I made them for you, you would want to marry me. But, I'm already married, so it could get ugly.)
Not the kind that Betty Crocker makes, but the decadent, chocolaty, a very small slice will do ya, kind. Truth be told, if Girl makes those boxed-just add egg, water, and oil-kind, and I am sorry to admit this, I am going to eat them.
Remember, it's nothing but truth here 24/7.
Yet again, a FAMILY SIZE box of brownies has a shelf life at my house of about twelve, maybe fifteen hours and again that is IF Boy isn't here eating the entire house.
So, who are these manufactures kidding? FAMILY SIZE? I don't think so. I once fed my family and my friends family of ten and it took a giant package of sausage from costco, a loaf of bread, oodles of muffins, more eggs than I can count, and an entire orchard of peaches!
I would have to make four boxes of brownies and purchase twelve boxes of Triscuits to feed that ravaging swarm. They wouldn't be given any Laughing Cow, because I only purchase that when it's on sale and it comes in itty, bitty, wedges of which a serving is only two.
I guess what I am saying is that I want a BIG box of Triscuits. A box that will last. I want a box that won't be half empty when I first open it. I want a FAMILY SIZE box that means business.
Because when Mister Smiley is here...he inhales the Triscuits right down to the little, salty crumbs at the bottom of the box.
Then I have to go to the store.