"I thought you were coming back from the liquor store..."
Well, no actually, I was coming back from the postal drop box. It does make one wonder though; do I appear drunk on the job? That would explain a lot...
"No one treats my girls that way!"
Spoken with feeling by the manager at work when she learned of a rather demanding and RUDE woman at the gym. Nice to know she's got my back.
"I didn't know it was Singles Awareness Day?"
Girl experiences her first "duh" moment on Facebook when she misunderstood the other side of Valentines Day.
"We're going to the monster truck rally."
When asked what her plans for Valentines Day were...seriously...
"I'm gonna have me a pretzel and a beer!" stated in full red-neck twang.
My response to the truck rally as an appropriate Valentines date.
"Look! We can get Chinese dinner for two for just $9.99!
Spoken by my Beloved as we stood at the deli counter at the grocery store on Valentines Day. Ain't it romantic?
"I think it's one of Annie's psycho's"
As uttered by a co-worker concerning a voicemail that no one could decipher. And yes, it was one of mine.
"Vegetarians make better lovers."
Television newscast from Fox News. Excuse me, I need to finish my steak.
"If you get out one more time I will shoot you in the head!"
Angrily shouted at the three calves that kept escaping while Beloved and FIL were out of town.
"You go girl!"
Spoken by the stranger on the other end of the phone when I made my mammogram appointment.
What have you heard recently?