Thursday, March 20, 2008

I've Never been Good at Waiting

I am annoyed

Peeved

Put-out

Irritated

And it’s only 7:15…

Where to begin, where to begin…

There’s the fact that FIL’s dog has had to go outside for the last 45 minutes. She’s in her kennel which sits above the wee girl’s room. You can imagine the racket as she paws at the floor and cries pitifully. Some people just shouldn’t have pets! Snort!

And, if it’s not one thing, it’s my mother.

Mine is acting strange. Strange in a way that tells me she’s peeved with me. The problem is I’m not sure what it’s about. Mom and I have had a pretty rocky relationship for the past, oh, I don’t know, forty years! I thought we’d moved beyond all this. I thought we were being open and honest with one another. I thought wrong. Grrrr!

Then the Monster announces to me that her mom is coloring Easter eggs…today…the girls saw her yesterday. They will not see her today. Why is this woman coloring Easter eggs without her daughters? Could she say they are too young? I think not. I colored Easter eggs with them last year and the Destroyer was only 20 months old!

Sad little Monster also told me that her brother got to move home yesterday…and she didn’t. She has beautiful blue eyes, this little Monster. Yet even when she smiles, it never reaches her eyes. There is a deep sorrow within her soul and none of us can reach it.

I suppose my biggest problem this morning is the fact that my dear friend is ill. I’m worried about her and that makes me edgy. I can’t go running to the hospital and entertain her for hours. I can’t dazzle her with my wit. I can’t even share with her the news about my new project. I have to wait.

Patiently

I hate that

Then again, it’s not all about me is it?

Guess I’ll go make some coffee, dress wee girls, clean the house, try to figure out what to do with my mother and wait for a call telling me my best friend is okay.

Sigh

Update 8:08 am: Friend will be staying another day in the hospital...

2 comments:

Kiva said...

Having someone close to you in the hospital is always hard. I think the friends/relatives that are the support system have the most difficult job because we don't know anything. We have to wait. We're not in control. It's almost easier to be the patient because at least he/she knows what's really going on in their body. Just remember that you play a vital part in keeping them alive so be strong and keep the faith.

Barrie said...

Hang in there. ;) xo